Life happens. Plans often don’t.

7 Mar

I recently lived through the experience of sending my youngest, my baby, off to school for the first time. You might be thinking..

“Daisy, you have 3 children. You should be used to sending them off to school”

In all honesty, before Diva & Intuitive started school, I thought that sending them off would be the hardest milestone ever. At that point in time, it was. Watching my little preemies walking into their new classroom, with backpacks that were nearly bigger than them.. Wow. Tough stuff. I cried. I also cried at nearly every school event, Mother’s Day program, pre-k “graduation”, etc.

Please, let’s not discuss how goofy the First Husband thought I was when I had tears rolling down my face as Diva and Intuitive put on a rousing rendtition of “3 Blind Mice” at their pre-k graduation. Thanks.

I couldn’t imagine that sending a 3rd child off to school would be anywhere near as difficult as sending my sweet first babies off. I never expected that it would be TOUGHER than the first time. Well…

Once Diva and Intuitive went off to the magical fun land of school, can anyone guess what happened? I’ll give you a hint.

Handsome and me. All day. Together. Alone.

I was so used to doing everything with 3 sidekicks, and dividing my attention between Diva, Intuitive, & Handsome. That was my life. Errands with 3, buckling 3 into the car, getting 3 out of the car, doing head counts while we walked around Target, simultaneously pushing 3 kids on the swings (it’s possible, I swear). Making breakfast, lunch, snacks; it was an assembly line. In one fell swoop, I was down to doing things with ONE child for 7 or 8 hours a day. My usual planning and leaving early to get places on time was pointless. Do you know how EASY it is to get somewhere with ONE child in tow? Handsome was upset about Diva & Intuitive being gone for.. oh.. about 10 minutes. Then he realized that he was solo with Mommy. THEN he realized that a decision didn’t require a 2/3 majority. If he wanted a bagel for lunch, he got a bagel for lunch.

Two years later, it was time for him to go to magical fun land.

About 2 months before school started for Handsome, after the girls had already started 1st grade, (pre-k works a little differently in my town. He started in January) I began to realize that things were going to CHANGE. Massive, mega, life changing, scary CHANGE. My sidekick was LEAVING ME. Not only was he leaving me; He. Was. EXCITED. What had I done wrong? Wasn’t he supposed to want to be home, hanging solo with Mommy FOREVER?!

Oh. No, he’s not. He’s ready for school. He’s well adjusted and ready to have a structured day at school with friends his age. We (I) spent weeks preparing. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t break down and cry like a baby a few times. Never in front of him. Mostly on the phone with the Mayor, or the First Husband. More often with poor Terry. That man has dealt with many tears. I cried when I ordered his backpack. I cried when I got his lunchbox. I cried when he turned 5, just a few days before school started. I had him try on his backpack and hold his lunchbox 2 days before school started, so it wouldn’t be a shock on the first day of school. He just seemed like such a baby, STILL.

So on his first day, the Mayor, First Husband, Terry, & Mommy took all 3 to school. We all went to Handsome’s classroom. It was buzzing with a gaggle of excited kids, a couple of excited teachers, some excited parents, and a few moms that looked like I felt. I tried to hold it together. I really, really did. I got Handsome set up with an activity, The Mayor and the First Husband walked Diva & Intuitive to their class. I made sure he was all set, and began my goodbyes.

I believe that’s when the waterworks began, as well.

We walked outside the classroom, me, with tears on my cheeks and stood there for a moment. Then, I noticed a window. So I peered in like a peeping tom with the Mayor by my side. Then, Handsome’s wonderful teacher noticed us. She was also Diva & Intuitive’s teacher, so she knows enough about my insane attachment to my children. We smiled a sheepish smile, mine riddled with tears, and started to back away from the window. She came out the door and held out a tissue and a book to me. “The Night Before Kindergarten”. A tale of a child’s night before the first day of school, and the parents all crying, but realizing that the kids are happy, so all is well. We laughed. I cried more. The First Husband laughed more. The Mayor’s eyes were slightly misty. Terry was hungry.

The Mayor & First Husband had blocked out part of their day to make sure that Mommy would be ok. We all went to breakfast, and I only cried once more. I held my phone the entire day, just in case the school called.

3 o’clock came, and I picked up my group. It was as if they had all been going to school together FOREVER. The energy flying out of him was incredible. He was almost vibrating from excitement. And Diva & Intuitive! They were so excited that their younger brother was in school with them. They each told me about every single time they saw him during the day; at lunch, on the playground, walking to his class. All my worry and sadness were wiped out with the happy smiles and stories I got from them. Handsome wanted to call EVERYONE in our family to tell them about his day, and we did.

All my time spent at home with them was not in vain. It made them the well adjusted, smart, happy kids they are today. I (with a little help from the Mayor & the First Husband) got them prepared to be independent kids, ready to learn and succeed. Hovering, planning, over thinking, teaching them, running our day to day lives like our own preschool; it was all worth it.

In my short, but full, journey through mommyhood, I’ve learned that 90% of the plans you make as a mom get thrown out the fucking window.

Whether it’s what you’re going to feed your kid, or how you’re going to react to them starting school; things don’t always go as planned. Rolling with the punches will get you further than planning.

What are some things that you’ve planned for that have gone in a different direction?

-Daisy

© Daisy and Violet 2012. All Rights Reserved.

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2 Responses to “Life happens. Plans often don’t.”

  1. "The Mayor" March 7, 2012 at 8:50 pm #

    Daisy… your family is a well oiled machine ( all with the kindest & most loving hearts ) ❤

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