A Salute to the Chubsters at My Gym

19 Mar

This morning, while running on the elliptical machine at my gym, I was sandwiched between two rather large women. They were both working up a huge sweat, and after a little nosy snooping, I noticed that they were running on higher inclines and higher resistance levels than I was. It took every ounce of class in me not to lean over and give them each a high five. Here’s why:

If there’s anything America has an excess of, it’s victims and fatties. Often, these two characteristics are found within the same person. We love our McDonalds, our frozen dinners filled to the brim with preservatives, and our Lays potato chips. Americans live to eat, as opposed to many other people groups, who eat to live. We’re also a bunch of victims. We whine when our own decisions render us in bad circumstances and seek to blame everyone else for our misfortunes. How did we become so sue-happy? Because some asshole with no hand-eye coordination spilled some McDonalds (See? There it is again!) coffee on her lap. We’re the nation that reminds people that our overactive thyroid/bum knee/whatever prevents us from exercising and making healthy food choices. I loathe these people. My daddy, The Irreverent Reptile, and I, even have a game where we make fun of the Victimology of America.

But those plump women in the gym? They’re doing something about it. They’re not in line for the passive yoga class; they’re pumping iron in the free-weight section. They’re running like the cops are chasing ‘em on the treadmills. They’re taking control of their lives and opposing the victim culture so many people embrace.

You go, Chubby Chicks. You kick ass in kickboxing, and show me what’s up at the bench press. You continue defying stereotypes. Get rid of that fat, and show the world that you’re not just another statistic.

High fucking five!

(Oh, and I want to give a little shout out to the massively pregnant woman I saw there, too. I quit the gym at the beginning of my third trimester, but this bitch was running at full-speed with her tight little baby bump bouncing in rhythm to the music on her iPod. Rock on, Mommy!)


© Daisy and Violet 2012. All Rights Reserved.

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9 Responses to “A Salute to the Chubsters at My Gym”

  1. Suzanne March 19, 2012 at 11:45 am #

    While I agree about the sue happy nature of our culture, you might want to actually find out why the woman who sued McDonalds for hot coffee burns actually did. Great documentary on it, I think called hot coffee. She had third degree burns, was 80 something years old, and needed skin grafts and just wanted McDonalds to help pay the medical bills. This was also a problem that had been previously reported that McDonalds neglected to do anything about.

    • daisyandviolet March 19, 2012 at 11:57 am #

      Appreciate your input.

      Not being a bitchy-bitch, but….

      Coffee is hot. That’s why you order it.

      Suing because your coffee was hot is like suing because you got wet on a water slide.

      People need to be responsible for their own actions.

      If an employee inside McDonald’s had carelessly dumped coffee ON her, that’s one thing. She spilled on herself. Not the fault of McDonald’s for serving a hot beverage the way it’s supposed to be served.

      -Daisy

  2. stephanie fitzpatrick March 19, 2012 at 12:31 pm #

    Not to be smart a** bitchy bitchy but it’s hypo thyroid. Hyper speeds up the metabolism. Great post!

    • daisyandviolet March 19, 2012 at 2:46 pm #

      Thank you, Stephanie! And you don’t have to asterisk-out curse words on here. Daisy and Violet approve of the word “ass.” =]

      • stephanie fitzpatrick March 19, 2012 at 3:21 pm #

        Thanks, Daisy & Violet! I’m thrilled you approve! So happy I found you both from Realist Scott~ you all crack me up.

        • daisyandviolet March 19, 2012 at 3:24 pm #

          Scott is great!
          Thanks for reading, and please, no asterisks! We appreciate the use of expletives!

          -Daisy

          • stephanie fitzpatrick March 19, 2012 at 3:25 pm #

            Isn’t he a piece o work? Welcome! Hell yeah!!! Thanks for showing me how to live a little =)

  3. Suzanne March 19, 2012 at 12:50 pm #

    It was actually overly hot, like hot enough to give third degree burns hot. Watch the documentary, you’ll be singing a different tune. I used to think just like you, until I saw it.

    • daisyandviolet March 19, 2012 at 2:44 pm #

      It’s the idea that the lawsuit represents – the idea that someone else should have to pay for “my” (generic) mistakes. That’s the mentality that’s sweeping the nation. That’s the idea I’m bitching about. -Violet

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